Notes to Mike

Dear Mike, Summer has flown by.  School for teachers will start up August 6, 2021.  That's in two weeks.   I've made progress with my mother.  We were disparate and now I'm trying to get her to cling onto health.   Just because she is 75 years old she lost a sense of vigor.  She became used to being depleted.  I hit a hard reverse on that state of mind.  I sent her something almost daily to shock her out of complacency.  My mother had embraced fastigue as an inherent fact of aging.  I had to challenge her emotionally to lose that state of mind.  Next I have to educate her on sleep, inflammation, gut and brain connection and finally  exercise.  If she can get a grip on these subjects then she has a chance at turning her life around. I've made progress with my house.  I've promised myself to get it together.  And I'm getting there.  It feels good. I wanted 10 new best friends and it's a tough journey...

Dear Mike, So.  Goal: 10 new best friends. Sigh. A lot of communicating. Betty ... For a moment I felt like I was sinking.  My neighbor Dianne. I wanted her to be my friend. But she is a different kind of animal. Tending to worry.  Being risk aversed.  Of a binary world.  Us or them.  Black or white. Hey.  I'm not saying that operating in the gray zone is superior.  Just different.  Rule of life: people like those who are like themselves.  Just that my heart is breaking... I wish you were really a friend that I could lean on.

Hi Mike, I'm not sure where to begin. I just listened to a thing on Nelson Mandela. And I'm drinking a beer. There's so much to catch you up on.  My mom is always tired now.  It's heartbreaking Mike.  She is a tyrant.  She has immemse flaws.  But this?  Old age?   When it doesn't have to be this... When we can command age with diet and exercise. She doesn't listen to me. Philosophically death is well, hey. But she is my responsibility Mike.  What am supposed to do?  Drop everything and save her or just make the attempt?  If that is what you say then I will do it.  Because I trust you. Next item. Scott.  Um a thing.  Now not a thing.  I extracated myself with a morticum of restraint.  I didn't cave to binary thinking.  Good.  Bad.  Useful.  Disposable.  I went for the gray.  Because I am fair and just.  Even if it's just in my mind.   I have resources.   ...

Hey it's me...  I'm organizing a tubing trip down the Little Miami River for this Saturday.   I've read that 5% of us are organizers and the rest of us are waiting to be invited. I've somewhat in a relationship for a week now.  Yay for me, right? It's not perfect. There are skips and misses.  But it's a far cry from being on my own.   So I have to shift my paradigm to accommodate for this new reality.   My best friend Brian professed that he believed in me, not that I don't lead with my flaws because I do.  And he accepts me nontheless.   I suppose we are on journey  .. and I wonder if we are not all seeking community.   I don't trust my vision as much as I trust yours.  Because you are compassionate and gentle.  I'm 25% there.   As always I miss your presence in my life.   I talked to Matt Barron last night and mused about how great it would to be a Greek god like Zeus or Hera....

Dear Mike, Hi the heat of summer is upon us.  I've been busy squaring the house away with Scott.  He's been so enormously helpful! I'm in a relationship of sorts.   Things are touch and go but still intact. I think that I'm making another friend who is a writer as well as a medical technician for a day job. The months are ebbing by. You are still on my message short list so I am reminded of you daily.  I think the will to reach the destination of what it would take to be a quality friend to you is often in focus.  And the path is not clear.   I just want you to know that I'm happy. It never takes away from the immense love and admiration that I feel for you.   Thank you for being my friend Mike. Thank you. Betty

Hi Mike, So I'm on this productivity kick. And listening to the book Atomic Habits. It feels like my life is about creating the Six Million Dollar Man.  Bigger.  Stronger.  Faster.  More capable. I tried to do that with my kids.  And now with myself.   Perhaps with YouTube.  With the world.  I think that is my driving force.  It is my driving force because I ask the question, "Why?" I have asked both children at one time, what is the meaning of life. I need them to wrestle with it while they were young.  I wanted it to nag at them. So. Now I'm doing audio journaling. I'm so excited about this. I miss our friendship.  You.  Indescribly valuable. Yet I still don't know how to not ruin it. It's July.  And my question each day is how do become a value add? How am I all that? The limit of a lifespan ever threatening.  The memories of the past to weave into a story for Bryan and Breeanna.  The countless articles t...