July 8

July 8, 2022

Dear Mike,

My mom is worried about a nuclear fallout with Russia/Ukraine/USA.  I told her about my guy over here, that he was sick, and really all the things that he does to drive me crazy.  For the first time in her life, she empathized with my situation.  She said, "Make sure you call him Betty."

I replied, "No, mom.  I can't give people more than what they deserve."

She got flustered and ended our conversation.

Did I say that my mom was controlling?  Yeah.

Today I learned about the components of trust.  It's when someone knows that you're authentic, when you have their best interest at heart.  

I also learned about what precipitates a relationship breaking up, when someone makes you feel like you don't rate at all and everything else is more important.

I watched a funny Kung Fu movie on Netflix and was trying to get into it with June, a cashier at Sav A Lot.  She did the Kung Fu Kid crane stance.  I mimicked her.  She said that she had no training but she could handle herself.  I replied, "What, are you going to hurt my feelings?" She said, yes, that was the old her.  Then she flexed her biceps for me to feel how firm they were… which I did.

I told her that she had no form, or whatever I said, meaning that she had no chance against me.

You didn't know I was such a badass did you?

That should be my superhero name, Betty Badass.

That should terrify any super-vilan.  You know, because I'm terrifying.

Well, I'm sure that you really needed to know all these things about me.  You're welcome.

I'm sorry for taking you to the precipice earlier.  It's really fun feeling like you're on the edge of a cliff and about to fall into the abyss.  Again, you're welcome.  I know you hate it Mike.  I don't have anybody else that I can talk to.

It rained today and broke the monotonous misery of summer heat.

I'm supposed to move by September first.  And I don't know if I'm staying or going.

I'm doing a shitty job at being efficient.  

So.  How was cutting grass today?  What is so great about that?  I mean it looks boring as shit.  Like I even hate cutting my own lawn.  Like, what is wrong with your brain?

See, I'm being a good friend because I'm taking an interest in you.  You're welcome.

Betty